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Wake up and listen to an audio book and then morning podcasts, morning yoga, breakfast, laundry, emails, work, lunch, work, snack, work, walk, work, dinner, blog post, art practice, novel writing, personal journal writing, media journal writing, read books…
I’m tired just typing all of those things out. Sadly, that tedious list of tasks was what my daily routine was becoming. The weekends differed only in that work blocks were replaced by household chore blocks.
Every available minute that I had was taken up by either work or a hobby. Now, each of the hobbies that I have, like creating art and writing, are things that both energize me and recharge my batteries.
Still, my “free” time was becoming so overscheduled, with little to no time for just vegging out, that I was beginning to resent my list of daily tasks. I was also feeling a bit panicky whenever I would miss a day of working out or time drawing in my sketch book. On the days when I missed something on my “list,” I would feel a bit of disappointment and as if I was backsliding on some big, invisible tracker that was tracking everything I did and monitoring my progress.
But the only tracker that was watching what I was doing was me. And as that tracker, I was trying to maximize my free time by being as productive with my hobbies as possible. I would post daily art updates so that I could see, and show, the progress I was making with this hobby. When I listened to podcasts and audiobooks on my daily walks, I listened to them on 1.5x speed so that I could get through them faster and make more progress on my personal edification. As soon as I woke up, I listened to an audiobook when making up my bed and then switched over to news podcasts when I made breakfast.
This tracked productivity was becoming exhausting. Now, I’m not one of those “people who hate leisure,” as described in this 2021 BBC article. But I was certainly finding ways to “hack” my leisure time. According to the article’s author, “Part of the problem, new research shows, is how comprehensively we internalise the message that leisure is wasteful.” I did fall into that trap, for sure. I felt that if I didn’t fill my leisure time with productive hobbies, I was being terribly wasteful.
Over time, though, I have started to give myself more grace. If I don’t practice art everyday, I don’t feel like I’m backsliding. If I’m feeling ill, or if the weather is horrifically inclement, I’m OK with not getting in that daily walk/jog. Sometimes I just—gasp—sit out on the back porch and drink coffee, looking at the birds in the trees, no iPhone, no music.
There are some “hobbies” that I do try to keep up on a regular basis. This weekly blog post is something that I try to only skip if I’m on vacation. It’s how I practice my writing skills, and it even helps me to get new writing and editing clients. I have also tried to be diligent about my daily novel writing. I set myself a goal to complete a novel this year, and I feel that it is a goal that I will be able to achieve if I keep up with that daily practice. It’s a goal that I’ve had my entire life, so it’s very important to me.
Again, though, if I’m feeling too tired, and I’ve had a particularly shitty day, I’ll give up those blogging and novel writing tasks, too. I’m learning to become a benevolent boss and tracker. That way my hobbies still bring me joy, without becoming yet another daily burden.
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